The "although we appreciate your interest please do not pin your hopes on being her match, it is highly likely she will not be able to find a live blood match" officially turned into, "YOU are the one in a million match".
I got the call yesterday while I was cleaning out the garden behind the garage. I spoke with Kathy, the transplant coordinator, for quite some time about the whole process and whether or not my potential recipient had been informed yet. My recipient had not been advised and as nervous as I was I made the decision to call her. Of course her phone went to voice mail and the next hour was spent frantically weeding the garden just to keep myself busy. She was very sweet when she called, she was not aware that I had even started the process and I think it is fair to say she was floored when I told her I was a blood match. I talked to her for an hour or so and came to the conclusion that had I met her in real life she is someone I would be friends with. If I go to Chicago for testing she wants to meet for lunch or a beer or something while I am in town, if I am interested.
Twice this year she has been called for a cadaver kidney, only to be told at the last minute that it wasn't going to work. How devastating. She just lets it roll off her shoulders. She admitted that there are bad days here and there but for the most part she just ignores it all and lets what will happen, well, happen. I would like to think that if I was in her position I would do it the same way but I seriously doubt I would be that strong.
Spoke to Mom about it, she is not ever going to agree with my decision but she is also not mad about it. I wish she was 100% behind me but I can see her points too. As a mom I would worry about all the little what-ifs too, it's what we do once we become a mom and I doubt it is something you can ever turn off. Everyone who knows me knows that for the most part I want to do this all on my own but I know I won't be able to drive myself home, I would love it if Kyr could but that is probably not going to be an option. I will have to do some soul searching to decide who I want to inconvenience for a ride home. I know there are scores of people that would do it but I have to figure out who will miss the least work/use the least gas/etc before I approach someone.
I spoke with HR today, the whole 30 days is excused duty, I do not have to blown my time at all to do this. I thought that was how it was set up but the paperwork they sent me for FMLA to cover my benefits said nothing about excused duty. Apparently no one has ever had excused duty and FMLA at the same time, I have to write in the excused duty by hand before I turn the paperwork back in. Tomorrow I will arrange my next step of testing, the sooner I can get this done the better but it may be a looooonnnnnngggg wait after the next round. I don't know how people waiting for an organ do this day in and day out, the wait freaking kills me.
So, I am an initial match and I can't remember the last time I was so nervous, excited or scared. I really did not think I would be a blood match and now that I am I have to make sure I don't get my hopes up about the next step of evaluations in case I get knocked out of contention. I like to think that the reason I could not get things lined up with the first few people I contacted is because the universe or god or fate or whatever was telling me that I was needed elsewhere. Whatever pushed me in this direction needs to keep clearing the way for me.
